ifen

It's been fuck long since I last updated this space. Basically nothing much to update bout' except some new pictures taken during this season.

Laterz.

As above.


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** Please feel free to skip cos this is going to be long and personal. **

This might be a cool place for ranting cos its kinda apart from the common blog and all. I cant speak so openly even when I'm at my personal blog.

Seriously speaking, I have been getting upset at times ever since the decision made to leave the company. Been on a emotion roller-coaster ride whether to set the letter on Nick's table.

I would love to stay cos I'm all settled with my stuff and such. There're lotsa things here awaiting me to explore and learn. It's all to do with my Diploma in Multimedia Technology.

Everybody here tells me "it used to be good here."

Perhaps, I joined at a wrong timing.

I believe I'm not a bad worker back in schools, and when I was at MediaCorp Singapore.

But I am feeling a lack of satisfaction here, right at Faber Image Media Pte Ltd.

I do not deny the short attention span I have within me. But, I will learn when its time to learn. I will do whatever needs to be done.

Over here, too many people are trying to lead. Too many people are instructing me to do this and that. I dont know who to listen to, who to talk to, who to work for. I thought I could excel, but I havent been "working".

Getting praises back then and getting no trust from people nowadays are killing me. What makes them think I'm not up for the job? Becos I have been trying to act so young and keeps everybody laughing? Becos I havent accomplish anything yet?

Cant I even handle a small event or something? All I need is someone to be there to guide when I encounter problems. Tell me what ought to be done, I'll do it. I dont need people to do it for me.

Nonetheless, the letter is on his table already. I dont wanna turn back and regret.

What I need to do now is to pick myself up and start hunting for new job opportunities. My mind have been telling me to search for an overseas job. Ive been trying but to no avail.

Dont ask me what I wanna do.

I have no clue, at all.

Tour guide, graphic designer, video production, record companies, photography...

Difficult.

Have been trying hard to laugh my way through. Acting happy cos I am going overseas real soon, acting stupid cos I'm the youngest among the group. I cant think of any other ways to make myself feel better..

I try to be optimistic like what books say about Sagittarius. Feelin' a lil tired now. I'll be lying if I say I dont wish for a fairy god mother now.

I may even feel a lot happier if someone just come to me, hold my hand, and keep quiet, listen to what my heart have to say.

It's been hectic for me to explain what I have been trying to say.


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~ifen
^ with an A in front
is a Old Fart
is Female
is a deviant since Jun 7, 2003, 1:04 AM
has 15,797 pageviews
is located in Singapore
is online
is currently -

It's been near to three years.

Since I was a polytechnic student having fun with my polymates till now; working, earning pathetic bucks day by day, facing the cruel world.

No wonder people say, "Interest gets you nowhere."

No matter how hard I try to get involved with photography and such, I cant be possibly making a living out of it, in Singapore especially.

Whatever.

Again, April this year gonna be making a trip. Enjoy! duh.

So disappearing act will be starting on 6 April to 12 April.

I dont care, I am going to continue snapping.

iFen


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